Remember the engineer I went out with at Christmastime? The one who was super sweet and affectionate online, and who was so cold in person you'd have thought we were in a business meeting?

Yeah. So he wants to get into a discussion about why I don't want to date him. He wants to conduct said conversation online. This cannot result in good things. Am I right?

Plus, even for the most openminded person, there comes a time when someone repeating why they don't want to date you becomes insulting. We are close to that point for him. Of course he doesn't see it because he A)really wants to figure this out and B)wants me to come around.

So he wrote me a drunk email this evening (which he gets points for, incidentally, because he's otherwise a nerdy engineer guy with too much composure). In it he lays out the reasons why--he believes--I think he's a big skunk. He then writes several additional paragraphs telling me how cool I am, how hot I am, and showers me with various effusive compliments.

For my part, I am stuck on the assumptions and his interpretations of what I've said, none of which are reflective of how I feel. What I do feel at this point are some hurt feelings, but before I realized my feelings were hurt I replied with an edict to officially stop our conversation on the subject because it was getting less healthy, and my ideas less understood, and someone was going to get hurt soon...probably both of us.

I don't mind being his friend but I'm not going to explain why I don't want to date him. (You will recall I already TOLD him why I didn't want to date him.) If it comes to that, I'm just not going to talk to him. If time changes my mind and I want to date him later and he's available, fine. But he doesn't get to decide that. F that.